In narcissistic abusive relationships, it’s usually the non-narcissistic person who keeps giving chances to the narcissist.

These people, And I’m sure we’ve all been there too, often missing the red flags. We ignore our instincts and give them many chances, hoping they’ll change, that’s one part of the story.

On the other hand, there’s the strong hold of the trauma bond, the toughest part of the relationship to break free from.

Overcoming this bond requires courage, patience, strength, and a lot of determination. It’s achievable because I’ve done it, and so can you.

During the relationship, many of us kept giving endlessly. Maybe you’re someone who always puts others first or struggles to say no. Boundaries might have been blurred, and you might have lost yourself to the narcissist, forgetting who you really are.

Enduring Narcissistic Abuse, Holding onto Hope Despite Unchanging Behavior

You endured unacceptable behavior like verbal abuse, financial stress, and sometimes even physical harm. Despite these challenges, you kept hoping they would change.

Trying to talk to a narcissist was like talking to a wall.

They dismissed your concerns, afraid you’d see through their facade and refused to work together.

Narcissists are fundamentally fragile and shallow. They prey on those who haven’t healed from past trauma, exploiting their vulnerability.

Many people in these relationships don’t realize they’re caught in a destructive cycle of narcissistic abuse.

Moving On, Recognizing Your Worth and Prioritizing Self-Care

You’re in a better place now, you’ve gained wisdom, found a supportive community, and are giving back. You’re realizing your own value and putting yourself first. No more chances for the narcissist or anyone else, unless you decide otherwise.

In that previous relationship, you gave everything and more.

You worked tirelessly to fix the damage not just to yourself, but to all your relationships. Imagine being on a boat with the narcissist in the middle of the river.

You’re steering towards safety, but they keep poking holes in the boat, hoping it sinks with you on board. And when it does, they’ve already moved on to another boat with their new person, leaving you behind without a second thought.

Facing Devaluation, Seeking Clarity Amidst Narcissistic Manipulation

The new person often someone who hasn’t healed, doesn’t understand narcissism, or is toxic becomes their focus once they disrupt your life. Their goal was to undermine you, erase your identity, and hide their true self from you.

As you began to realize this during the relationship, you tried to have mature conversations for clarity. You sought honest communication, but instead, they avoided you with excuses like “Can’t talk now” “I’m busy” or by focusing on trivial things from long ago.

You felt ignored, lost, and in need of answers, which they never gave.

This lack of openness is a clear sign of the devaluation stage in narcissistic abuse, leaving you feeling exposed and defenseless.

Three things made this worse:

• You didn’t know about narcissism.
• You were unsure how you got into this situation.
• The person you trusted to explain things was the one keeping you in the dark.

When you trust, love, and respect someone, seeking their help or understanding becomes pointless if they are your enemy, your worst fear. In these times, clarity slips away, leaving you confused and uncertain.

Unveiling Narcissistic Tactics, Recognizing Manipulative Behaviors

Imagine someone who once said they loved you now won’t talk to you, ignores you, blames you for everything, makes you doubt yourself, involves others against you, and spreads lies about you in every relationship you’re in.

These are the tactics narcissists use, like tools on a belt.

Learning about these behaviors helps you understand what happened to you, turning your experiences into wisdom.

When you understand how narcissists operate, you stop giving them chances. This change brings a moment of clarity, suddenly you no longer see the narcissist as romantic or believe they can change or miss you.

Breaking Free, Overcoming Narcissistic Manipulation and Applying No Contact

They’re as transient as a mirage, entirely not real. In fact, they’re even worse, and everyone, including themselves, knows it.

When the narcissist crumpled you like paper and tossed you away, they never thought you’d heal, understand narcissism, see through their false facade, or completely cut them off like blocking, deleting, and distancing yourself from their friends.

If going no contact feels impossible, try the gray rock method and try to be uninteresting and fade away from their radar.

But most importantly, stop giving them chances. Each time you allowed them back in or tried to revive a failing relationship, you only prolonged your own suffering.

The Cycle of Abuse, Narcissistic Exploitation and Emotional Manipulation

Every time you gave them another chance, they saw you as weaker and weaker, thinking like “Oh This person, isn’t strong enough. They feel something’s wrong, they know they should leave me, but they don’t get who I really am. As long as they keep giving me chances, I, the real-life narcissist, will do whatever I want”

“I’ll keep acting that way, manipulating them, making them feel worthless, dragging them into chaos, and keeping them stuck in a never-ending cycle of emotional ups and downs.”

“I’ll keep living in their head free, finding ways to hurt them because I can’t control myself. That’s why I have several phones, an unpaid assistant, someone to apologize for me, and a listener. I need someone to hurt.” that’s what a narcissist does.

Reflecting on Empathy and Narcissism, Understanding the Depth of Emotional Capacity

Coming back to our true self, I’m grateful we are not a narcissist, empathy means a lot to us. I hope you’re in the same boat, not lacking empathy like some. If you do have empathy, be proud because it’s a rare gift nowadays.

On the other hand, some people can’t love deeply. They live shallow lives that won’t change, no matter what. There’s no instant fix for them.

What will change is their behavior, getting worse over time as they feel more entitled.

They’ll keep abusing any chance they get, which might explain why you kept giving in your past relationship. Maybe you were just trying to please, not knowing what you do now.

Seeing Through Lies, Understanding Narcissistic Manipulation in Relationships

When you were in that relationship, you had no idea what you were dealing with. At first, you probably thought the narcissistic person was just having a difficult time like a bad day, week, or maybe even a rough life.

But the closer you got, their behavior got worse because they learned more about you.

They sized up your empathy and resources, knowing exactly how much they could use to their advantage. If you didn’t realize they were a narcissist and kept giving them chances, they’d use each one against you.

They’d blame you for everything, what they did or didn’t do, and why the relationship ended. They’d shift the responsibility onto you, making you feel like it was your fault things fell apart.

The Inevitable End, Understanding the Dynamics of Narcissistic Relationships

In every relationship with a narcissist, it will eventually end, even though it may not seem obvious at first. Actually, every relationship eventually ends. This community focuses on understanding narcissistic abuse and how to break free from it.

It’s important to recognize that these relationships were bound to conclude.

Either you would leave, cutting off their chances to use you, or they would discard you when your resources ran out.

Your money, health, connections, status, and self-confidence may have suffered because of them.

They once saw you as valuable, someone they could manipulate into loving them, marrying them, or doing business with them. But in the end, they drained you without you even realizing it.

Moving On, Breaking Free from Narcissistic Influence and Valuing Privacy

“So what did I do next? I chuckled right in their face and quietly slipped away into the shadows, moving on to someone new.” The narcissist hoped this person would stay stuck, never healing or moving on. That’s how they think.

That’s why you shouldn’t give them second chances, why you should block them, and why you should keep them in the dark about everything from your hobbies, relationships, everything.

They shouldn’t know anything about you.

They don’t deserve to hear your voice or snoop on your social media.

We all know by now that narcissists are all over social media, not just checking yours but everyone else’s too. They’re always comparing their past, present, and potential future sources of attention.

Breaking the Cycle, Standing Strong Against Narcissistic Manipulation

Narcissists groom new people for relationships by targeting those who don’t value themselves, are naive, and lack boundaries. These individuals are valuable to boost the narcissist’s self-esteem, but they’re eventually discarded like crumpled paper on a freeway, continuing the destructive cycle.

The goal of this article, and my content overall, is to empower you to prioritize yourself.

You deserve to be your own top priority, leaving no room for toxic narcissists once you recognize their impact.

On the path to healing, it’s crucial to reduce their influence by protecting yourself, setting clear boundaries, and focusing on activities like meditation or pray, journaling, therapy, and self-reflection.

Take steps to heal from past wounds and practice self-care to foster growth and well-being. Most importantly, strive to limit contact with narcissists to safeguard your emotional health.

Taking Charge, Blocking Narcissists and Taking Back Control

If the narcissist blocks you, it’s important to block them back. This step is crucial because if you don’t, they stay in control. They might reappear unexpectedly, unblock you, and try to manipulate you again.

Taking action now is key and don’t wait for someone else to save you, rely on yourself.

Here’s the reality, stop giving second chances to those who don’t deserve them. Don’t waste your energy on the narcissist.

Understand they won’t change, they only get worse over time. And remember, your time, money, love, empathy, and soul are priceless.

Moving Forward, Choosing Positivity and Planning for Change

The narcissist wanted to drain your positivity and replace it with their negativity. They never wanted you to break free, heal, or find yourself again. But you’ve managed to do it, or you’re in the process, or you’re about to.

That’s why I always say on my articles, do something positive for yourself today. Even if you’re still in a relationship with a narcissist, like a parent you live with, start planning your way out.

Remember, where you are now won’t be where you stay.

Giving them more chances won’t make them change. Think back to when things were good at the start, and compare it to how the relationship turned sour. Despite your efforts to hold it together and give your all, the narcissist gave nothing back.

Wrap it up

Think about how that relationship ended, maybe suddenly and unexpectedly. You might have tried to set a boundary, only to wake up the next day to find things drastically changed.

It’s unpredictable.

Here’s the ke, once you understand narcissism and its impact on your life, stop giving chances to people who don’t deserve them. Whether they’re narcissists, toxic individuals, or energy vampires.

These are the ones who drain your energy after a long day, leaving you feeling exhausted and robbed of your time.

That’s why it’s so important, don’t waste your time on people who drain you.

When you were in that relationship, you didn’t know what you know now. Now that you do, recognize how lucky you are to be out and healing or already healed.

Know your worth and understand that you are valued and appreciated, not by narcissists, but by me and this community on medium.

We’re here to support you in breaking free from toxic relationships.

This is Ryan. Remember, true change begins with a spark.

If someone shows even a hint of toxicity, remove yourself from the situation, that’s the message.

I hope you found my article informative and helpful.

Please let me know what you think, God bless you, Love you all, and take care!

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