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The Narcissist’s Game Plan Keeping You from Healing

The Narcissist’s Game Plan Keeping You from Healing

Let’s talk about the narcissists game plan keeping you from healing. They’re good at causing chaos, they enjoy making life difficult, creating conflict, and keeping control through abuse. They trap people in a cycle that stops them from moving forward and keeps them constantly judging themselves.

The Narcissist’s Game Plan Keeping You from Healing ©Article cover made by the author & Photo by Bram Bergers on Unsplash.

After leaving a narcissistic relationship, their goal often becomes stopping your healing journey. The narcissist doubts your ability to 1) break free from their influence, 2) recover, 3) recognize their true intentions, and 4) achieve complete emotional detachment, the point where you no longer feel affected.

But let me reassure you, you’re either already emotionally detached or steadily getting there. There are often disruptions along the healing path.

Sometimes the narcissist intentionally drains your energy, other times, it’s more subtle, affecting you spiritually or emotionally.

Firstly, narcissists can sense how you’re approaching healing and self-discovery.

This often leads them to hoover, testing whether you’ve seen through their facade, cut off contact, or changed how you behave and communicate. They watch to see if you’re open to reconnecting and monitor any changes in your actions, words, and reactions.

Moving Forward After Narcissistic Relationships, Handling Interactions and Progress

Always remember, reject any attempts by the narcissist to draw you back in. If you’ve moved on from a narcissistic relationship, when you’re ready, cut off all contact. Block them, delete them, and distance yourself from anyone associated with them.

If that’s not feasible, consider using the Grey Rock method, be boring and stay off the narcissist’s radar.

As you heal, you’re gradually putting the narcissistic relationship behind you. You’ve processed a lot and are still learning about behaviors like gaslighting, triangulation, and smear campaigns based on your own experiences.

This process has brought you wisdom.

Even so, the narcissist may sometimes sense your healing progress. You might wonder how they do this.

The truth is, narcissists seem to have a sixth sense. Their timing can be surprisingly accurate, even after the relationship ends. It’s not always the case, but they often have a way of knowing if you’re moving forward, no matter where you are.

Overcoming Their Efforts to Disrupt Your Healing Journey

When narcissists do this, they often test your limits and see if you understand who they are and what narcissism means. Their goal is to disrupt your healing journey, just as they did during the relationship.

The truth is, narcissists don’t want you to recover.

They thrive on disturbing your peace and occupying your thoughts. They resist your efforts to break free from their control and the trauma they caused. They prefer you to be their pawn, puppet, or someone who always apologizes.

That might have been your role in the past, but not anymore.

Now you recognize your boundaries and the inner strength the narcissist once tried to weaken. They may have succeeded for a while, but now you’ve overcome that. You’re moving towards a healthier life, free from the toxicity of narcissistic people.

Overcoming the Narcissistic Relationship’s Lingering Effects

Let me explain why I’m telling you all this. When you’re trying to heal, you might still encounter things that remind you of the narcissistic relationship like a song, a smell, or something someone wears. These reminders can be hard to avoid.

But as time goes on and you keep working on yourself, these triggers will bother you less and less.

Understanding what the relationship truly was and accepting it for what it was, toxic, draining, and manipulative, takes effort and self-reflection.

Some triggers you can avoid, but others will catch you off guard, like a surprise song. These moments can feel like tests, showing you how much progress you’ve made in healing.

It’s not necessarily the narcissist trying to provoke you, but everything happens for a reason.

Everyone faces challenges, and some have already moved past the difficulties of narcissistic abuse, while others are still dealing with them. The main thing to remember is that the more you distance yourself from the narcissistic relationship, the less it will affect you.

Over time, their influence weakens, and you become stronger.

They lose their hold on your thoughts and feelings. It takes time to fully grasp this, but know that the narcissist may still try to keeping you from healing process.

Uncovering Truths and Focusing on Healing

Think back to a time when you felt something wasn’t right in a close relationship maybe with a partner or family member, who later turned out to be a narcissist. Back then, you might have quietly looked into narcissism, wondering if it described what you were experiencing.

You might have even brought it up gently, asking, “Do you think some of these traits apply to you?” Without you knowing, the narcissist probably looked into it too, using the same information to accuse you of being the problem instead.

That’s how they operate never taking responsibility, avoiding self-reflection, and blaming others.

Their biggest fear is being exposed.

But as you heal, your goal isn’t to expose them, it’s to understand yourself and your past. It’s about learning, growing stronger, and taking care of yourself. Despite the difficulties in those relationships, you’re now focusing on self-care, setting boundaries, and building healthier connections.

Finding Strength and Growth After Narcissistic Relationships

Maybe we’re moving past relationships now, especially those with narcissists. You think about how much healing you’ve needed like taking things slower, writing in a journal, meditating, going to therapy, dealing with old hurts from your past, and learning from videos and articles.

You see how much you’ve changed from who you used to be.

You’re growing, getting stronger, and becoming the best version of yourself, the toughest you’ve ever been.

There are three versions of yourself: the first one before you met the narcissist, the second one lost during the tough relationship, and now the third version rising up like a Phoenix from the ashes, a powerful, changed you.

This is when you’re reaching or almost reaching a place where you feel indifferent, detached emotionally.

But remember, narcissists will try to keeping you from peace. They did it from the beginning, throughout the relationship, and often even after it’s over.

Think about the Hoover maneuver, they might send you a package, ask for something back, email you, or have someone else contact you. Why? Because they thought of you. They realize the worth they had in you, not in their new partner or anyone else from their past, but in you.

Empowering Yourself After Narcissistic Relationships

That’s why you shine brightly once you break free from a narcissistic relationship. You’re no longer trapped in their negative energy where they thrive. Narcissists can’t improve themselves, they rely on draining others’ energy and switching places with them.

This is how they interact with you.

Remember when you first met the narcissist? Maybe you were always trying to please others, saying yes all the time, and seeing everyone as well-meaning.

But then the narcissist came into your life and took you on an emotional roller coaster.

They manipulated you and tried to take everything from you start from your time, money, energy, love, and empathy, everything we talk about here.

They keep you from successfully living your life for a while maybe days, weeks, years, or even decades. Perhaps you were born into a narcissistic family. But something changed.

You had a moment of clarity and realized something wasn’t right.

None of the things they said were true because they came from the narcissist, leading you down a harmful path. They didn’t care about your well-being then, now, or in the future. That’s how narcissists operate they’re stuck in a cycle, and you were caught in it for a while.

Protecting Your Healing Journey, Understanding the Narcissist’s Motives

But why does the narcissist want to keep you from healing? It’s because they don’t want you to succeed. They don’t want you to discover your inner strength, resilience, courage, determination, and perseverance.

They don’t want you to win, they don’t want you to cut them off and block them.

You might ask, “Why talk so much about blocking on this article?” I emphasize it because, first, it works. Second, many caring people or those not used to blocking may feel bad about it.

When dealing with a narcissist, there’s no need for guilt, you have to put yourself first.

You have two choices: stay in a toxic relationship or leave, heal, and know that blocking is crucial for your recovery. It will give you back your energy, clear your mind, and restore your clarity.

Your health, finances, and social life will improve and you’ll rebuild your life, maybe even move if necessary.

Even a moment in a narcissistic relationship is too long. Once you realize who they truly are, they’ll do everything possible to keep you from peace. Imagine the relationship ended years ago like two, three, five, or even ten years and now you’re thriving. You’ve healed, grown stronger, and life is amazing.

Narcissists’ Manipulative Tactics, Understanding Their Attempts to Derail Your Healing

And then comes an unexpected email. You don’t recognize the sender’s address. Intrigued, you open it to find a message from someone from your past and yes, the narcissist.

They’re claiming love, insisting they’ve changed, found religion, seen a therapist and saying whatever they think will draw you back in. Why do they do this? To stop your progress, to keep you from moving forward without them.

This reveals how weak, shallow, and self-centered the narcissist truly is.

They believe their false persona will always fool others, that people won’t heal, that once they had you, you’re theirs forever. But that’s not true.

Once you see through their act, go no contact, and start healing, though it takes time, a lot of it you will heal.

As you heal, you’ll see the narcissist is weighed down by problems and baggage.

They can’t manage themselves, constantly need attention, and disrupt the lives of their children, businesses, and partners. This restless behavior explains why narcissists are always chasing the next exciting thing just like they once saw you.

Embracing Change and Closure After Narcissistic Relationships

That’s why they don’t appreciate or respect people, why they take others for granted, why they try to disturb your peace, and why they resist your healing. That’s why it’s so important for the narcissist to be completely out of your life, forever.

If you were discarded, I feel for you.

If you ended things yourself, it’s just as tough because these relationships are really hard. They almost brought you down, almost knocked you out.

That goes for any relationship.

But here you are now, realizing that yes, the narcissist did keep you from peace. Maybe even now, as you heal, they’re trying to keep you from peace again. Maybe you have people around you who act as their messengers. Maybe you still have things they gave you.

If they gave you more than a simple gift like a coffee mug on a special birthday, those items might still be in your home. Now could be a good time to pack them away in the basement or attic.

Maybe it’s time to donate their gifts to charity. Perhaps it’s time to rearrange the furniture in your home. Maybe it’s time to understand that change happens in your life and theirs too.

Personal Growth vs. Stagnation, Contrasting Paths After Narcissistic Relationships

The difference between you and the narcissist is that they can’t change or grow. They stay stuck in their harmful ways, holding others captive as long as people believe their false image.

Sometimes, this lasts a lifetime for some.

Since the end of that relationship, you’ve changed. You had to learn about narcissistic abuse patterns and think about how you ended up in that relationship.

You had to protect yourself and take a good look at your life.

The narcissist, though, just moved on to someone else. They keep using manipulation and causing harm without dealing with their own issues.

Now, you’re growing into a new version of yourself or are about to.

Meanwhile, the narcissist stays the same. As time goes on, they might become what’s known as an Aging Narcissist, which isn’t a pleasant thing to see.

Wrap it up

Over time, the narcissist loses their looks and charm, and they desperately cling to their youth. They might even pursue relationships with much younger people, which is sad and pitiful.

The Aging Narcissist refuses to accept reality.

During your time with them, they never truly saw the real you. Instead, they saw someone they could exploit like taking advantage of your lack of knowledge about narcissism, draining your energy, and taking whatever they desired.

That concludes the article. This is Ryan signing off. Remember, you’re not alone. The narcissist always tries to keep you from peace, but strong boundaries can stop their efforts.

We acknowledge our strength and focus on ourselves, refusing to give the narcissist any more of our energy. If possible, maintain no contact.

I hope you found my article informative and helpful.

Please let me know what you think, God bless you, Love you all, and take care!

Check out our publication about Narcissism if you want to learn more or join us to write: Me and Narcissism

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