The narcissist doesn’t stop. They keep pushing, pulling, manipulating, and making others do what they want. Narcissists push every relationship until it’s breaks, and every narcissistic relationship eventually ends, as I’ve mentioned a lot in my articles.

The narcissist keeps pushing people until they’ve had enough. When that happens, it’s often a point where many people, like you and others, decide to cut off contact and block them.

Think about the hobbies narcissists pursue. They don’t just casually try out hobbies, they dive into them intensely for months or even years before losing interest.

Narcissists get bored easily, whether with people, hobbies, or anything else. They drop hobbies suddenly and pick up new ones. Why? It might be because of someone new they’re involved with or because they see some benefit for themselves.

Manipulating Social Circles, How Narcissists Assess and Exploit Relationships

Take exercise, for example. Sometimes, narcissists want to be in great shape, not always but sometimes. Why? Well, it’s partly to stay healthy, but also to attract others with their appearance.

This isn’t just something narcissists do, it’s pretty common.

The same goes for their friend groups.

Narcissists blend in, pretending to be kind, caring, and healthy. Once they’re in, maybe even a group you introduced them to, they start assessing everyone’s worth to them.

In simpler terms, they think like does this person own fancy stuff like a boat or beach house? What about this one, they just rent, not much use to me.

And this person will inherit money soon. Hmm, who’s worth my attention? I’ll focus on the first and third, and I’ll mess up the middle person’s relationships because I can, no one will catch on to what I’m doing.

Undermining Friendships, How Narcissists Disrupt and Divide Social Circles

This is how narcissists operate, they keep pushing until something breaks. For example, think about your long-time friend group or community.

Now, imagine you’ve been part of the group I had for years, perhaps even decades, and you introduced a narcissist to it. Slowly, they created tension and drove a wedge between you and your friends.

Soon, you noticed your friends weren’t calling as much or treating you the same way.

The narcissist’s relentless pushing eventually caused the group to fall apart, either leaving you out or making you want to leave. (This is actually what happened with my group: some of my closest friends from Romania and Greece left me in shock. They were all good friends of mine for many years, and now we barely talk, we’ve almost become like strangers.)

In situations like this, the person targeted by the narcissist faces a tough choice: stick with a friend group that no longer supports you and endure their negative campaign against you, or walk away.

It’s a difficult decision, but that’s how it goes.

When you realize that a narcissist will do anything to control and disrupt your life until it breaks, you understand that any time spent in such a relationship is too long.

That’s their strategy as they move from place to place, disrupting lives wherever they go.

Narcissists thrive on seeing others’ lives fall apart, each narcissist is different just like each of us is unique.

But those who want to cause the most harm often target people they know well or who they see as kind and stable, they want to make you suffer for being yourself. That’s why they relentlessly push relationships until they fall apart.

Experiencing the Roller Coaster of Marriage with a Narcissist

Think about engagement or marriage for a moment, imagine you’re married to a narcissist, or in a relationship where you live together. At first, everything seems perfect it’s like a fairy tale. But once you moved in together or got married, things changed.

The narcissist realized they had control over you, whether by moving you far away, getting married, expecting a baby, or making you rely on them.

Once they feel they have you, the manipulation and mistreatment often get worse, especially behind closed doors or in private moments.

They act one way in public but differently in private.

They’re skilled at switching between making you feel good and bad emotionally. Just when you’re almost at your breaking point, they might stop mistreating you and show affection, pretending to be happy and understanding.

This makes you think, “Maybe they’re not so bad after all.” You might even have a few days where things seem stable again. But be careful, it’s not that simple.

Imagine you start feeling comfortable in your relationship with a narcissist.

It seems like they can sense this comfort. Just when you think everything is going well, they start using tactics like gaslighting, giving you the silent treatment, ignoring you, or getting angry.

They manipulate you by blaming you for things they’ve done or making you feel like you’re the problem, these are the things I talk about on my article.

These are the tools they use whenever they want, because back then, you didn’t see your relationship falling apart.

You thought you were in a loving, secure relationship, that’s what they wanted you to believe, behind their mask.

Then, something big happens maybe you get married or move in together. That’s when the narcissist realizes they have control, and they start behaving worse until the relationship starts to break down.

Earlier, I mentioned that every relationship with a narcissist eventually ends, something you’ve come to realize.

But when you started, you didn’t know about narcissism. Maybe it was a lifelong friendship or a parent you trusted, and you thought they were loving and caring.

Over time, you saw they weren’t changing.

They were actually getting worse, constantly manipulating you. This realization leads you to learn more about narcissism and yourself like myself, realizing life could be better without such a toxic relationship but here you are, dealing with it.

You realize that being in a relationship with a narcissist means facing constant ups and downs, what I call micro-rejections. For example, if it’s a parent, they might play you against your siblings, making you either the family peacemaker or the target of their jealousy.

Despite your efforts to keep the family close, your siblings may not share your enthusiasm, feeling overshadowed by you. They didn’t want you to succeed, they wanted to break you and your relationships.

Isolation, A Narcissist’s Tool of Control

That’s their tactic, they enjoy seeing others struggle and thrive on their misery. It gives them energy. Narcissists crave attention, whether positive or negative, but they especially seek negative attention from someone they can control and dominate.

If you’re empathetic or always positive, often helping others, including the narcissist, you probably gave a lot to the relationship.

But the narcissist saw your nature early on, even before you understood narcissism, giving them the upper hand until you realized things weren’t improving.

Whether it’s a sibling, parent, or relative showing narcissistic behavior, you might find yourself cut off from family, unable to see nieces, nephews, grandchildren, or even your own children.

This isolation is a red flag of narcissism.

While it doesn’t confirm narcissism, in a healthy, loving relationship, you should have access to family.

Manipulative Tactics of Narcissists, Smear Campaigns and Isolation

Toxic individuals understand how much you want to see your children, grandchildren, or great-grandchildren. They use this against you by blocking your access, leaving you anxious about their well-being.

It’s a troubling situation, but the narcissist knows exactly what they’re doing because they’re calculating, manipulative, crafty, cruel, and highly effective in their schemes.

Narcissists always have a plan, whether it’s running a smear campaign or isolating people, especially after the relationship ends.

Yes, I mentioned it twice to emphasize its importance.

Think about what a smear campaign involves. It’s when the narcissist expects the relationship to fall apart, often around holidays, birthdays, illnesses, finacially struggles, in debts, or after the loss of a loved one.

They’ve been preparing by gathering allies (flying monkeys) and spectators ready to watch someone’s life unravel. Over many years, they’ve planted lies about the relationship in people’s minds.

Effects of Narcissistic Smear Campaigns and Isolation

And then what happens? You right, the discard happens or the relationship suddenly ends, leaving the person who was with the narcissist without realizing it, alone and isolated.

They struggle to understand what just happened, why their support system disappeared, why no one calls or checks on them, and why no one asks, “Are you okay? What’s going on? Can I help?”

These gestures don’t come because the smear campaign has already caused damage, possibly lasting a lifetime, especially if you grew up in a narcissistic family.

If you’re a sibling, you likely faced early smear tactics.

All of this occurs because the narcissist intends to repeatedly break relationships.

How often have you had to block or unblock a toxic person multiple times during or after a relationship? Maybe it’s a sibling, you block them because you can’t keep giving money, being there for them, offering rides, or providing shelter.

Recurring Cycle of Narcissistic Manipulation and Reconciliation

Then they start to wear you down. They might contact you from an unknown number or send an email from a different address. You read it, thinking they’re in trouble or having a hard time.

You unblock them, talk to them again, they get close to you, you let them back into your life, and the cycle goes on and on.

This time, you fell for it again.

If you keep blocking and unblocking someone repeatedly, it’s a clear sign the relationship isn’t just strained and it’s already broken.

You shouldn’t try to fix such a relationship.

I know it’s hard to break free from a trauma bond, but that’s another topic. This article is about showing when narcissists keep pushing too far until relationships fall apart, that’s what drives them.

Motives Behind Narcissistic Manipulation

They find pleasure in watching others suffer. They use tactics like parental alienation, triangulation, gaslighting, smear campaign, and silent treament.

Narcissists lack depth and empathy.

They copy those who work hard, follow rules, and care for others. But narcissists only want to cause harm.

They want to gather up sadness, ruined relationships, money, and things. For them, life is a game about getting more. Ending relationships is like winning another game to them.

This is how they live their lives, and this is exactly what they do.

That’s why, before I finish, when you started the relationship, you didn’t realize what you were dealing with. You didn’t know this person wanted to break you down, not build you up.

Now you see it was the opposite, they aimed to tear you down, not support you. Because narcissists prioritize themselves, not others.

They speed up any relationship they find useful.

They treat their children, parents, and siblings the same way. How often have you seen someone stop talking to their sister for a year, then suddenly start again, only for the cycle to repeat?

Wrap it up

Once someone becomes wise, they say, “No, I need to block them. I can care about them from a distance, but I can’t have them in my life anymore.” Eventually, the toxic person will wear them down or pretend to be vulnerable or a victim.

They might say, “Maybe they’ve changed, you know what, I guess…” The person who blocked them, maybe you, starts to doubt. You try, you don’t remember all the bad times, you remember a lot, but you remember some good times too.

Again, that’s planned.

Then when you unblock them, they come at you from a place of vulnerability or they seem changed, and then here we go again, the cycle continues. Unfortunately, the cycle always goes on, but it should go on without you because now you understand how tough the relationship was.

You should never accept a Hoover or any communication from a narcissist or any toxic person if you can avoid it.

Once you gain wisdom, use it, and go no contact to block these people.

So everyone, that’s the article. This is Ryan, true change begins with a spark. I really love writing it.

Remember this before I finish the article:

The Narcissist will push every relationship they can to the edge until it breaks. And yes, will they recycle people? Yes, they will.

I’m not just talking about romantic relationships, I’m talking about siblings, children, moms, dads, friends, business associates, they will continue to recycle people until those people wise up and gain insight.

Because they think they’re smarter, they think others will never see their true colors, they think others can’t see behind their facade, and they think others are naive and weak.

That is not you.

You are a bright shining light, and you’ve been through something most people haven’t. You now have the ability and power, which is speaking the same language as me. So, you need to understand that not all people care about your well-being, no matter what they say, and actions speak louder than words.

I hope you found my article informative and helpful.

Please let me know what you think, God bless you, Love you all, and take care!

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