Ever wonder why that narcissist is mad at you? It’s because you’re not as miserable as they hoped. You’re focusing on yourself, healing, and moving forward. This really bothers them. So, keep bothering them.
I’m Ryan, a writer who helps people recover from narcissistic abuse. In today’s article, I’ll explain why, when a narcissist loses their cool, you’ve won.
Let’s get into it. But first, please consider bookmarking and sharing this website to help spread awareness about narcissistic abuse.
Your narcissistic partner, or even a parent, feels the hardest hit when they see you succeed. They can’t handle it when you thrive after leaving them or cutting off contact.
Why? Because they want to be the center of your world, they want you to find all your meaning and purpose only through the relationship you had with them.
Defying Narcissistic Influence and Finding Inner Strength
Once you let go and see them clearly, understanding they’re empty, boring, offering nothing real, and have taken advantage of you, and you find peace knowing you’ll be okay without them, they feel defeated.
Their purpose is to hurt others, that’s what gives their life meaning.
When you cut those ties and say, “I’m focusing on myself now, no matter how long it takes. I’ll become stronger than I ever was in that relationship” you silently but strongly show that they aren’t essential, they aren’t all-powerful, and you don’t rely on them.
They kept saying, “You’ll never find anyone like me. You’ll never be okay without me.”
But as you move forward in your life, though it’s tough, draining you prove them wrong every day. They’re watching closely, and they know it.
Sabotaging Happiness and Envy in the Shadows
They want to keep you unhappy, knowing you’re still stuck in those dark places, still suffering. But when you begin to heal and move forward, breaking free from the past, that’s when they feel defeated.
The truth is, they don’t want you to succeed in getting a job, getting fit, trying new things, discovering your talents, or stepping out of your comfort zone.
They prefer to see you trapped in pain forever.
What do they get out of this? It’s twisted and cruel and it makes them feel important. They also enjoy seeing others suffer, showing their true evil.
This makes them believe they’re powerful, even though it’s not true.
They’re also jealous of you, which makes them angry. This jealousy turns into envy, wanting what you have.
I will write about this in a future article on how narcissists behave when they’re jealous. Their envy makes them toxic, pushing them to try and bring you down. But when they fail, they’re left feeling ashamed of their own shortcomings.
The Narcissist’s Struggle to Retain Control After You’ve Moved On
They always compare themselves to you, thinking they’re better, you know this already. But when you prove them wrong, break free, succeed, or find a new, positive relationship, they face reality.
When you start moving forward, that’s when they might try to pull you back in.
They seem to sense your progress, like they have a sixth sense, knowing about your success, freedom, and healing.
They don’t want you to move on, they want to keep you stuck.
That’s why they can seem like demons, desperate to hold onto you.
How do they trap you? They act nice, bring up things they left at your place, or use other tactics to manipulate you back into their grip.
This cycle can go on for years after you leave, as they shamelessly try to pull you back whenever they can. Even after you leave, they may continue trying to pull you back in for years. That’s why it’s important to keep those doors closed tight, forever.
Overcoming Narcissistic Betrayal and Moving Forward with Strength
Let’s talk more about betrayal, a major part of narcissistic abuse that goes beyond just cheating. Narcissists betray you financially, physically, emotionally, and in every possible way from the start until you break free.
When they get angry at you, don’t retaliate or let their anger affect you.
Instead, concentrate on living your life to the fullest. Treat them as if they’re unimportant and no longer a part of your world.
Keep your feelings private, acting like they no longer occupy your thoughts. They’re in your past. This is how you truly move on from them.
Keep going after your goals, focus on healing, strengthen your defenses, and protect yourself from narcissists in the future.
Find meaning in what you do to truly move past their influence.
Why is this so important? Because while they may chase after shallow goals and distractions, they can’t find real purpose in their actions like you can.
Basically, narcissists see your achievements as a threat because they only care about themselves. Their deep insecurity makes even small things feel like personal attacks, because they won’t face their own flaws.
That’s all for now. Let me know your thoughts in the comments if this resonated with you. Keep working on healing and progress until next time.
